I always like to leave a disclaimer in the beginning of my pregnancy posts. I LOVE Tatum with all of my heart and am so grateful I was able to birth a healthy baby. I know everyone’s journey is different and recognize that I had a very healthy pregnancy compared to many. I know it is a privilege to just make it to the third trimester and be where I am today. However I also want to share my experience in the most honest way I can. I feel like pregnancy is very glamorized and I don’t hear many people share how hard it really is.
my third trimester
It is interesting to look back on my pregnancy journey now that I am no longer pregnant.
For my first two trimester recap posts I listed out my favorite parts about each trimester (you can read my first trimester recap here and my second trimester recap here). When I was pregnant I thought for sure I would miss it. I loved feeling Tatum kick and move inside me. And just all the anticipation leading up to my delivery I was so excited to finally meet her. But now looking back I realize how difficult the end of pregnancy was for me and that I really didn’t have many “favorite parts” of my third trimester.
I worked up until I was 39 weeks pregnant. I never realized how exhausted and sick I felt during the third trimester (and really my entire pregnancy) until after I delivered. Even just two weeks post partum, with 3-7 hours of broken up sleep each night and learning how to be a mom… I still feel 10x better now. I have so much more energy, I am no longer in pain, and I feel so happy.
I definitely think working full time night shift contributed a lot to how tired I felt when I was pregnant, especially during the end. But even after I stopped working (I went two weeks past my due date so my maternity leave started two weeks before I delivered), I still felt exhausted all the time. My belly hurt, moving around was so uncomfortable, and I couldn’t do a lot of the things I could normally do. Even the smallest tasks and things that bring me joy were so much more difficult. It was like it took a day’s worth of energy to make one Target run, go one a walk, or even text a friend.
Aside from having to pee even more frequently, I don’t remember feeling much different when I transitioned from the second trimester into the third trimester. Mostly I just felt more uncomfortable and more exhausted. The very end was the most difficult for me. I was only scheduled for work through the week before my due date. However I ended up calling out my last scheduled shift because I kept vomiting that day. Even at the end it was normal for me to throw up – I would say I vomited at least 2-3x per week throughout my entire pregnancy, but that day I think I threw up over 10 times. I think Tatum was just consuming every ounce of energy and nutrients my body had.
Not only was the physical aspect hard, but mentally I was so exhausted. I knew it was common especially for first time moms to go past their due dates, but I was getting so anxious and antsy by the end. I wanted so badly to deliver early or around my due date. I tried everything to try to put my body into labor – dates, raspberry leaf tea, curb walking, long walks, labor ball exercises, stretches, the mile circuit, sex… I tried everything.
And then my due date came and went, and I still had no baby. I was so emotional and remember feeling so sad and disappointed that I had not given birth yet. I was anxious about my delivery and wondered if Tatum would be healthy and if I would have a traumatic birth. I noticed myself saying negative things a lot while everyone else seemed to reassure me that I “would do great” and that everything would be fine. I was trying so hard not to hold my breath. I think I was slightly in denial about everything that was happening and could not believe I was so close to delivering my baby. Since I am a mother bay nurse I felt like I knew exactly what was coming and would meeting my baby would be like, but at the same time I felt like I had no idea what it would be like and had a hard time imagining that I would have a healthy baby. I remember crying to Ryan nearly every night because of how exhausted and sad I felt that she wasn’t with us. I was so worried when I didn’t feel her kick for some time, and would provoke my belly to get her to move around.
When my doctor told me he had scheduled my induction date for 41 weeks I felt some relief that I would definitely deliver around then and knew there was an end in sight. I felt like without the induction she would have stayed inside me forever.
As I got closer to the induction I got more nervous. I barely slept the few nights before, partly because I had to pee every 10 minutes – it got so bad I would pee and then before I could even get off the toilet I would have to pee again. Which I figured would happen but it definitely didn’t make it easier to rest before birth.
If I could see what my life looks like now back then, I still don’t think it would have made the third trimester any easier. If there is one important thing I could share its that I feel so much better not being pregnant. Again I know its different for everyone, but that is just my experience and I am so glad to be able to share it here!
