Beckham's Birth Story
I’m so excited to finally share Beckham’s birth story! After having an induction with Tatum (you can read her birth story here) I really wanted to avoid that this time around and, ended up almost having a precipitous birth!
As grateful as I am to have had a healthy and very normal pregnancy, I did not enjoy this pregnancy as much as I enjoyed my pregnancy with Tatum. I was SO exhausted and uncomfortable especially towards the end, and it was especially difficult being pregnant while also taking care of a two year old and working night shift. I had a great post partum experience with Tatum, and had been looking forward to the “after” part of delivery with Beckham as well. I just knew I would feel SO much better – and I have. I am always so happy to have my babies on the outside and to be past the labor and delivery process!
I also had more anxiety this pregnancy. I felt like I barely had time to think about this pregnancy and baby and the times I was thinking about it, I was just worried. After having a very painful labor and recovery with Tatum I had been worried about having the same experience again. With this being my second baby, I was constantly thinking, “Will I love this baby as much as I love Tatum? Will I like having two kids? What will it be like to have a boy? Will I like having a son? Will the experience of meeting my second baby be just as special as my experience meeting Tatum?”
I was also anxious about the timing of Beckham’s birth – Ryan was away directing a sleep away soccer camp over an hour from our house the last two weeks of July (was 4 nights each week). I also had scheduled a hair appointment ( I only go about 4 times per year and my stylist books 2 months out) a little over a week before my due date, and scheduled newborn photos 5 days after my due date (they are typically done 2 weeks after baby is born and this date worked best with our photographer). Obviously these were not the biggest things to have to reschedule but I was still hoping it would work with at least one of them!
We also had a lot of issues going on with our house at the time, and had not gotten the nursery ready – we planned to move Tatum up to her new room and turn her nursery into the new baby’s nursery, but had to delay it for various reasons.
The day before
The day before I went into labor, I had an OB appointment in the early afternoon. I was about 38 and a half weeks, and decided to ask my doctor about a membrane sweep since I had heard it could help induce labor. With Tatum I had done ALL the recommended things from the raspberry leaf tea and dates to the miles circuit stretches, and ended up being induced at 41 weeks since I went so late past my due date. When my doctor checked me at my last OB appointment this time, I was 1-2cm dilated and he agreed to a membrane sweep, telling me it works about half the time and that it has low risks in my case. I told him I really wanted to avoid an induction this time if possible since I did not have the best experience before.
The day Beckham was born
The next morning, I woke up at 6:45 when Tatum woke up. My hair appointment was scheduled for 9:30, and I was also scheduled to work that night. I tried to go back to sleep (Ryan was home and got up with Tatum) but I was not able to fall back asleep. I made it to my appointment, made it back home, and attempted to nap before going into work while Ryan and his family worked on putting the crib together. I even took a little bit of unisom which I had been taking to help me sleep when I was pregnant. However I was still not able to sleep. Around 2pm I believe I lost my mucus plug – which I knew could indicate labor, but also knew it may not mean anything. Shortly after, I had maybe one or two contractions – but I really was not even sure they were contractions. I just felt the slightest bit uncomfortable and did not think much of it at all.
Then around 3:20pm I starting having more consistent contractions. I had at least 8 contractions in about 45 minutes – I was trying to time them but some of them felt so long like 2-3 minutes long and I could not completely tell when they were ending. I also was not having any pain with the contractions but they did feel more intense than the braxton hicks I had been feeling for months. I thought maybe they were cramps from the membrane sweep the day before and decided to give it a few more minutes. The last one or two felt more uncomfortable so I decided to call out of work “just to be safe.” I also told Ryan to keep his mom on standby as she was planning to stay with Tatum while we were in the hospital.
About 10 minutes later I had 2 more that were becoming more intense and painful, and I told Ryan, “Call your mom back!”
We left the house less than an hour later. I screamed on the drive every time I had a contraction, and called my doctor and the hospital on the way. When we got to the check in desk, the lady checking us in took about 10 minutes to review paperwork with Ryan while I continued to scream while squatting on the floor, with one hand on the desk. I felt like I was making such a scene in this huge lobby with about 10 other people. Near the end of the check in process the lady told me to sign something and when I stood up, Ryan pointed to the camera she was holding in my direction. I tried to smile through the contraction but I still don’t know how that photo ended up turning out!
Finally we made it back to the triage room where 3 nurses attempted to help admit me. I continued to squat on the stretcher, screaming with every contraction, apologizing to the nurses for being so loud, explaining that I have a very low pain tolerance. They all reassured me it was okay (I think they felt bad for me lol). One of them checked me and told me I was 8 cm dilated and I asked if I could get the epidural. Somewhere in this process one of them asked if I had a natural birth with my first baby, to which I quickly yelled, “No!” in response as a natural birth was definitely not in my birth plan.
Thankfully the anesthesiologist came pretty quickly in about 20 minutes and started reviewing the risks. I cut her off saying, “I am aware of the risks” and I think I signed that consent faster than I had signed any other paper in my life.
Once the epidural kicked in, all my pain went away. The nurses asked how I was feeling and I kept saying, “Praise the lord!” The anesthesiologist came back to check on me and I told her I wanted to give her a hug. She said, “oh that’s okay” and I held out my arms and basically made her hug me because that was all I could give her, though she did not seem to want a hug, and then I proceeded to tell her I loved her as if I had not made her feel uncomfortable enough at this point. But truly I felt like she saved my life and I had nothing else to offer her. I had barely gotten any of the fluids the nurse hung, which is typically preferred before epidural placement because it can lower blood pressure. So I was especially appreciative of her because I truly believe I would have blacked out from the pain.
At this point I think it was around 6:45pm. I got to rest for the next hour while Ryan informed the rest of our family I was at the hospital. I even did my make up in the labor bed. I remember thinking I could not believe how fast everything was happening.
About an hour later, my doctor checked me and I was fully dilated. At some point my doctor ended up breaking my water since that still had not happened. Before I knew it he and my nurse told me it was time to start pushing! I pushed for about 3 rounds, maybe 5 minutes total – my doctor could barely get his gloves on in time. I could feel more with this epidural than the one I had with Tatum, which was actually nice because I could feel Beckham being born while I pushed but could not feel any pain (which was ideal in my opinion).
I believe I would have had an even faster delivery – what is known as a precipitous delivery – when labor is less than 3 hours, if I had not gotten the epidural (which can slow down labor). Precipitous deliveries are known for being extra painful, so it is a little “funny” I tried to avoid an induction because of the pain, and then ended up almost having a precipitous birth that was almost as equally painful. I also ended up losing close to a liter of blood which I later learned, but thankfully did not have any effects from.
When Beckham was born
As I mentioned before, aside from having a normal and healthy pregnancy, I had a lot of worries going into delivery especially after having an early miscarriage before getting pregnant with Beckham. Once he was born, all my pain and worries went away. He had such a vigorous cry which was just so reassuring to hear immediately. It was such a special and magical moment, just as special and magical as the moment Tatum was born. I felt like we bonded immediately. I cried and told him I loved him. Ryan looked at me in a way I don’t think I have seen him look at me before, like he was so proud of me. It truly was an experience I will never forget. There were no scary moments like there were during Tatum’s delivery and aside from the pain before the epidural I truly had a great labor and delivery experience this time.
The recovery
Pretty much everything this time around has been way better, including the recovery process. With Tatum I had a peri urethral tear, so it hurt to the point where I screamed and cried every time I peed the entire first week. I did tear this time as well but it was in a different location so it has not been painful to pee this time.
More questions
I have received several questions related to Beckham’s birth, family planning and more, so I figured I would address them here!
Q: Is this your last baby?
A: Honestly, we are not sure. I think we will likely have a third, but would plan for at least 5 years from now. Ryan and I both feel like we are at max capacity with two kids currently.
Q: What is their room situation?
A: We moved Tatum upstairs to the 3rd floor bedroom which used to be the playroom. She is still in a crib, which we plan to keep her in until she is too big or attempts to climb out. She currently loves her crib and sleeps great in it, and with all the other changes happening, we wanted to keep what we can as consistent as possible.
Q: what was the membrane sweep like?
A: The membrane sweep just felt like a more thorough cervical check – just slightly uncomfortable. I know everyone has a different experience though.
Q: What is his birthdate?
A: I chose to share Beckham’s name and photos with the internet but will be keeping his exact birthdate private.
Q: How did you come up with his name?
A: Honestly Beckham was the only boy name we agreed on. I have a list of about 35 boys names I would use if I could, but did not realize Ryan liked one of them until after looking through thousands of names together. I love Beckham so much and am so happy he agreed to one of the ones on my list! Ryan would have chosen Kai as the first name if it were up to him, so I agreed on that as Beckham’s middle name even though I think they have very different vibes lol. The fact that Ryan agreed to one of the many boy names I liked was enough for me and I was happy to let him choose the middle name. I am also a fan of shorter, one syllable middle names following a two syllable first name so I did not mind how it all sounded together.
Beckham means “homestead by the stream” and Kai means “sea” or “ocean” in Hawaiian, so I do think it’s neat they have similar meanings.
Q: How was his birth compared to Tatum's?
A: I touched on this a bit throughout the post but overall everything has been better this time!
Q: Where are his name announcement sign and outfit from?
A: Beckham’s name sign is from Olive Branch Embroidery. His outfit is from Kissy Kissy and I had Tice and Co do the embroidery. The swaddle blanket is Beaufort Bonnet!
